Old Stories: Juliana - Outtakes

rent, some weeks later.

Juliana watched Lawrence uneasily as he approached the bench where she was sitting. His lips were tight and he walked with a tense gait. It was evening and a balmy breeze blew her dark hair about her shoulders, but he didn't look, wouldn't look at her. He tried very hard to look calm and nodded politely as he passed. His tension was all too much for her and she sprang up to his side and clutched his arm.

"Lawrence!" she called.

"No, no please, Julia, you must please understand!" he begged.

"Lawrence, don't torture yourself! I know your weakness - I've seen it in many men, and it drives them mad if they do not succumb to nature!"

"No, Juliana, I can't go through with it! Weakness or no, I mustn't be faithless. There have been too many bastards in my family…"

"There need not be any children! I understand you, and if you continue like this you'll explode sometime in council and make a fool of yourself, shouting! Please, look at me!"

Lawrence's face grew more taut. "No, if I look, I'll see too much!" He quickened his pace. "If word were to get to the Queen that I had a mistress, she'd never get over it. She is so childlike, she'd take it as love! I cannot hurt her. That is final!"

The King broke away from her and walked on.

Juliana paused, defeated, and continued behind him. He called back to her, 'Julia? You're not hurt, are you?"

"What if I was? Would you consent?"

"No, I'd feel terrible but I could never consent."

"No, then," she answered. I'm not hurt, just angry with you for being so unwise."

Just then they entered the central administration building wherein was the Great Hall. Lady Juliana waited while he went into the Hall so as not to make appearances bad, then entered.

All through dinner she watched him. He spoke with people and occasionally stole a glance at her. She would pretend not to see but also would glance a little back at his upset look. When dinner was quite over, he walked out and gave her a "don't you dare!" look which made up her mind for her. She silently stood and went to her rooms to prepare herself. Back in the Maison du Soleil Lawrence hastily prepared for bed and once he was ready he poured himself a glass of brandy to muddle his brain so he couldn't concentrate. He sat without drinking for a long time. Somehow, no matter what he tried to think about, a mental image of Julia's breasts of Josephine's back would make its way into his mind. He would then shiver and shake his head.

Suddenly he heard a noise on the balcony. He rose to investigate.

This is where the story stops. It proved to be missing. This was what sparked me to try my hand again at writing about Lawrence, Josephine, and the whole cast. The new stories, written in 2006 and 2007, often contain new versions of the old stories and many characters, like Juliana, who got edited out before the novel was in its final draft. After we are done with the old stories, I will start posting those 2006-07 stories, indicating which made it into the novel and which did not. You can bet the Juliana stories did not make it into the novel.. nor do any of the old stories remaining to be posted here.

In the missing story that belongs at this point, Lawrence gives in to his desire with plenty of encouragement by Juliana. Laura objected strongly to this subplot, not because of the affair but because at the time I told her having a concubine was no more serious than having dinner with an old friend. Don't worry, I don't feel quite that way now. But I was experimenting with ideas and writing at the tender age of 18, no more need be explained.